Sunday, August 12, 2012

There is always something to post about...

There is always something to post about...  but whether it's uncomfortable or not, that's another story.  Talking about the uncomfortable is what this blog is for. It has been a while since I posted, but that doesn't mean nothing has happened.  It usually just means, I haven't found the strength yet to talk about it. 

Has anything changed?  No, not really.  We're still here, my health is so so...  we don't have any plans, and we still talk to people about CNBC.  One thing though, I write mostly about how CNBC affects me.  I show my emotions so much more than Lawrence.  But he showed them recently.  He is much braver than I am. 

This year, I escaped church on Mother's Day and went downstairs to take care of the nursery.  I think that's the only way I could have handled it, I certainly could not have been in service.  Because of my own feelings, not anyone else's.  But on Father's Day, Lawrence only said one thing about the day.  For him to say something, it bothered him.  (I won't share it here, that's his place...)

So often, we are strong for far too long.  When we finally let it get to us, does it ever.  The emotions have hit me a few times lately.  Seeing a foster child in need or up for adoption - but then realizing my health isn't up to it.   That hurts... 

I was asked recently for an update on here, so this is it.  Not much lately, nothing new, the same old same old society that makes you feel like you amount to nothing because you don't have children.  Yup.  I said that.  It's true.