Sunday, May 31, 2015

How high is the bar we set for people in our lives?

Do you ever feel inadequate in daily life?  Couldn't perform a job just right?  Can't figure a problem out?  Can't live up to someone's expectations?

How do you answer someone who expects you to have children?  But it's physically impossible.

They automatically hold you to this bar, this level, a standard they set.

Them:  Do you have children?
Me:  No we don't.
Them:  Oh, you don't have them yet.

YET?  I wasn't given the option of NOT having children in their eyes.  From that moment I felt inadequate in their presence.  What a way to meet people.  People/society do not realize the sadness and depression they instill in your life everyday.  I walk into a room today and automatically see this bar, this level I am expected to live up to, yet I KNOW I can't.

Where is my rock to crawl under?  Time for a blanket fort and a coloring book...

With these unreachable bars set, what is our purpose in life?  For me, to glorify God.  Our purpose is not ourselves.  Our purpose is not our children.  (OH I know I will be stoned for that one.)  A friend, with a daughter, recently told me that she raised her daughter to stand on her own feet, not to rely on her, not to live vicariously through her, not to smother her.  She said so many parents glorify their children instead of God.

But what if you are angry at God because of being childless or something in your life?  I can't lie, some days I am for CNBC.  I wish I had an easy answer for that one.

It's a matter of seeing and accepting the life God has set forth for you.  Our selfish, human heart gets angry.  But who are we to argue God's path for our lives?  It might not be what we thought it would be - but it's how we glorify God that shows our strength.

I may be sad - but I am grateful...

What false bar are you setting for someone else in your life or you meet?  For us, stop looking at that bar someone else sets and look at the bar God sets.

Should we give up on our human dreams then?  NO.  NEVER.  But...  open your eyes to be sure they are made with God's glory in mind.  When we do, the let-downs in life are over shadowed.  I am sad in not having one thing my human heart desires, but I am grateful in the life and marriage He has given us.

                                  ~ Lord, I pray this pain in my life helps someone else.

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