Saturday, March 29, 2014

Stupidity... "Infertility Is Part Of Evolution"

(Warning dear fellow CNBC, do not read this if you are sensitive today.) 

Get ready to see the snarky side of me...

Some people we meet are encouraging and a wonderful strength in our lives dealing with Childless Not By Choice.  When I tell someone about the negative comments we hear about not being able to have children, they are shocked that someone would even voice it, let alone think it.  Then we meet someone like this... 

A dear friend was faced with the stupidity of this selfish society.  A woman, who has children, publicly-openly stated her 'opinion' on why some women can't have children.  THIS IGNORANT WOMAN IS WHY WE NEED TO EDUCATE ABOUT INFERTILITY AND CNBC.  

At a recent lunch outing, this woman started stating her 'opinion' that the reason some people cannot have children is because it's evolutions way of controlling the population.  That there is something wrong with them and it's nature's way of weeding out.  And she added that they should be happy they don't have to worry about what parents have to worry about.

What?  That isn't just ignorance (Webster's definition of 'not knowing'), that is flat out stupidity.  And she openly vocalizes this to anyone who would listen.  Although I have never hit someone in my life, I dare her to say this in a room with a few of the CNBC families...  It might not end pretty.

It's one thing to be an encouragement to someone, it's another to tear them down. Whether you believe in God (like we do) or you believe in evolution, there is still a human decency that you learn to 'hold your tongue' and not tear someone down.  

It's the hurtful comments that we hear every day that make this even harder.  But...  it's people like my friend, who share her children with us, that lift us back up and make the ignorant woman crawl back to her own selfish little world.  

I call her selfish because she obviously doesn't appreciate her children or home, wishing she didn't have to 'worry about' the things a mother should.  Many of us would give anything to have those worries.  But with adoption being cost prohibitive or your health not being strong enough to have children....  many of us can't achieve those dreams.  

I pray that this woman's eyes and heart are opened to her callous words and attitude.  She could be an encouragement to someone, instead she chooses to cut someone down.   

"...every careless word that people speak they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgement."  Matthew 12:36

This is why I openly talk about being Childless Not By Choice and teach (or put in their place) people who do not know. 


  1. Thank you lawrence and Jenny. your words describe exactly what I am feeling. It is so so hard to deal with infertility especially if you know deep inside that there is no chance at all for you to conceive. I am only 24 and I have been married for 2 years and guess what ? 2 days ago my first invito failed .the result was negative. 2 days ago was my marriage 2nd anniversary the same day I got my period. I am not only broken but also depressed .sorry but I cant accept this CNBC

  2. Thank you for creating a blog about CNBC. I feel like these days it's assumed that if you want something bad enough then you will do whatever it takes to get it. So when my husband and I decided we don't (at the moment) want to go incredibly into debt to pursue IVF or adoption, that made it our choice to be childless. This was not our choice! It hurts and I ache for a child of our own, but I don't feel like the 'have a baby at all costs' persona suits us either. We don't want to put ourselves through any more of the emotional turmoil of 'trying' with IVF, and at this point in our lives it wouldn't make sense to go that far into debt to adopt, and then be financial unstable with a child. I think our society doesn't believe any longer in the concept of gracefully accepting your circumstances. It's not that we wouldn't change things if we could, but God put us in this situation for a purpose, and although we struggle, we know HE is in control.

    1. thank you... thank you... thank you... You said what my heart screams. Please read my post from tonight. With His love, Jenny