I was recently told about a dear woman in my life and her struggle for children also. Finally when she was told she was unable to conceive, she made a choice. Her sister told her that she would share her own daughters with her... Unfortunately, Aunt Carol couldn't handle that. It hurt too much... Yes she was there for us and loved us sooo much, but she also pulled back. Not everyone can totally understand the hurt Aunt Carol had, but I can.
Aunt Carol and I are alot alike in ways, but this decision is where we are different. Whether to pull back, choosing to walk this path alone or choose to embrace the children already in our lives - it is a daily decision.
I am so very blessed by family and friends, who also share their children with me. To have my niece stay a week at "Aunt Jenny's" (she compared it to summer camp!). And as many of you know, I have a seamstress shop that I travel to historical reenactments with. I have met wonderful friends who are so much like family now. Their children come running for hugs, saying I am their second mama, friends leave their baby girl with me to hold and watch while they walk. The children always know they will get a hug and be loved on when they come to see me! This is the choice I make...
Yes, people with CNBC go through depression, but we have a daily choice to make. And I encourage anyone going through this to open up, sharing in their lives the joy and the smiles... Yes it still hurts, but oh how much joy and fulfillment we get back!!! Lawrence just said, "You can choose to embrace the pain, or embrace the little ones..."
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